Getting To The Heart of Designing The Perfect Grave Marker
I began my career with O’Connor Mortuary at precisely the right time. My boss, Neil O’Connor, is an idea man and to my benefit, one of his better ideas was that all of our orders for grave markers should be designed and processed by one member of our staff. He chose me for this role and three years later, I could not be more honored that he did.
A grave marker is the rectangular bronze or granite stone that is placed on the grave of a loved one at a cemetery. While the name is that of the departed, the marker is created for the family to remember them by.
Grave markers tell a beautiful story in a 28×16 rectangular space. Multiple photo tiles may be used to chronicle each decade of your beloved’s life. Custom emblems allow the opportunity for meaningful hobbies, clubs and organizations to be represented. Your relative’s signature can even be immortalized on granite for future generations to examine.
Some families come in with exactly what they want written on the marker. They select a basic design and we typically meet for thirty minutes or less. This same family will usually approve the first proof and have their marker delivered within a month.
Other families will take years to complete their loved one’s marker. Sometimes the process is too painful so they put it away for a period of time and contact me when they are ready to resume. Some families even create the artwork for the marker themselves.
I’ve noticed that many of my families are looking for someone to hear their story and help them develop a marker that is the perfect tribute. With these families I typically spend about 2 hours or more listening and learning about their loved one. This is where I have found ministry through memorializing.
I believe it is what I am made for.
Out of the Wheelchair
My position is also unique in that I have ongoing contact with the families that I serve. During the weeks or even months that the marker is being designed, approved, produced and delivered, I am in frequent contact with the family. We share a lot during this time.
I have been invited to their children’s baseball games, family gatherings and lunches stemming from the connections that we made.
The most important element of my job is that families trust me enough to be transparent and invite me into their world and what they are experiencing each day. That is the heart of why I am so passionate about what I do.
Career + Passion = Beautiful Thing
Neil O’Connor gave me solid advice when I began this position: “Treat this like it is your own business.” It has ignited a fire in me that makes me strive to be the best I can be. Pride of ownership is a driving force but beyond that I have found my purpose and passion.
Have you designed a grave marker for a member of your family?
What was the biggest challenge in the design process for you?
What do you want your grave marker to say one day?
58 Comments
Lori – It has been a pleasure to see you thrive in this role. You have taken our company to another level. Your care, compassion & professionalism for our families shines through everyday. I am proud of you and grateful for you, thank you! Neil
Neil,
I certainly do not take you being proud of me lightly. You set a high bar and if I have achieved even half of that, then I feel I have succeeded. I look forward to what the future holds. There are many more opportunities for me to personalize my service and I am working on these ideas all of the time.
Your leadership sets the example of how I should always take service to the next level. I will always be honored to be part of the great things that are happening at O’Connor.
With Gratitude,
Lori
Lori,
As your Mother I am very proud of you, reading what you do day to day makes me realize that all the love, caring, and concern you have had all your life has never left you. You are a very Special Person. I am so happy you work in such a wonderful environment with people who care for one another and there interests. Love Mom
Thanks Mom! I learned from the best when it comes to being loving, caring and compassionate. I am very blessed to have you as my Mom!
Love you so much!!!
Lori
Mark,
Thanks for your heartfelt words. Lol!
More importantly, thanks for letting me pick on you and be the MUCH younger sister you never had and never wanted!! You make work fun!!
“Livin’ It?” “Calm Down”
Love ya Brother!!
Lori
Shasta,
Thank you for your complimentary words. I take that to heart as you are one of the hardest working people in that building! More importantly, you always do it with a smile. You have an inner light that shines and I am so glad to have you as my friend.
I didn’t get to meet with your family to design Casey’s marker, however, I look forward to running into your family around town now that we are neighbors. I know from the sweet girl you are that I will love all of them too. <
<3<3<3
Lori
Jodi, I am honored by your words, as you are quite the hero in our community. Your unending efforts to spread awareness about prescription drug abuse is admirable. I know God and Jarrod are looking down on you with a great deal of pride and love. That is obvious from all of the signs you have received. I am honored to have you as a friend and partner in our community!
Love You,
Lori