102 responses to Travis James White

1. 

   Hagen says:

   July 28, 2007

   Hello Mr. White:

   It has been a while since I have written anything. Just been trying to get things squared away with me. I talked to Mama Bear today and shared with her one of the best worst date stories of all time. I know if you’re looking down you were cracking up at my expense, but all I can even do is laugh about it now. I think that one flew over the coo coo’s nest twice! Anyway there isn’t a day that goes bye that I am not reminded of you or inspired by you. Thanks for being such a great friend. Talk to ya soon.

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2. 

   Mom says:

   August 1, 2007

   Oh Trav……..I know I am blessed in so many ways, by so many people….people all around me that you loved, that loved you…Dear sweet Hagen…who has not missed a weekly phone call to me in all these 15 months…and makes me laugh…and yes ! He does have the greatest ” worst date story” ever !!! Your sweet, sweet Letty…her emails and her love have been so wonderful….and Candace too….being connected to the very people that you were connected to, the people you chose to share portions of your life with…to have them in my life…there are no words to describe the joy it brings me. Jared, Bree, Greg, Jay, all in their own ways have helped so much. Your sisters…..who have lived each moment of this nightmare along with me…their own spirits sagging with the weight of your passing, have held me up…refused to let me suffer alone…they’ve been there Trav, in a way I never knew possible. I always knew they loved me…but I never knew what it feels like to truly be loved in such a way, as they have loved me over the past 15 months. Leslie. Who remembers me when she knows I will be remembering you the most…and swoops in to save me. How many people have friends like this? My Parents. God love them. They try so hard to protect me…still…always…whenever they feel I am thinking of you too much….too hard….with too much sadness…they try so hard to divert my attention….”How’s Rufus ?” Daddy will say…so cute, so sweet…I am so blessed to have them still here with me. My Grandchildren…….SIX perfect, beautiful beings…always so thoughtful about my feelings of you…so tenderly they bring you up…so cautious…watching my face, to make sure they don’t hurt me. God, I love them. And last, but certainly not least….my Rick…my Rock. He has put up with so much from me….without complaint. My tears…my sudden outbursts of truly unwarranted anger, my ups…my downs…up again, down again…..weight up, weight down…and weight up….irrational mood swings…the man deserves a plaque somewhere, or sainthood….or something!

   What is my point here? What is it I’m trying to say?
   Just that……
   I know how blessed I am….
   but I am still so sad…
   I miss you so much…
   and nothing..
   nothing can make that any better.
   Nothing.

   I haven’t had one moment of normal since you left…
   I miss you my son….
   I love you.

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3. 

   Hagen says:

   August 6, 2007

   “Dream as if you’ll live forever, Live as if you’ll die today.” I saw this quote and immdeiately thought of the way we live. Our litle crew lived by this, we may not have said it in these exact words, but this is how we live. Funny that I came across this just after I was talking to Mama Bear yesterday about my lifestyle, and how unhealthy it might be. Was this a message from you? I think so. To remind me that while we do have to be somewhat responsible in this life, we also must realize that we aren’t here forever and doing things our way, and having a blast at the same time is what we have always been about. Whether that is the right way or not, it never really mattered because we always have each other. What a ride it has been, and continues to be. I have seen more sorrow inside 15 months then I hoped to see in an entire lifetime. But I believe as you did that we aren’t ever given more than we can handle, and that we may come out of it scarred, but never beaten, never defeated and stronger than before. So, “Dream as if you’ll live forever, Live as if you’ll die today.” Lots O’ Love bro!

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4. 

   Hagen says:

   September 5, 2007

   Hello again Mr. Travis:

   It’s been a little while since I stopped by the page to write you, but you know there isn’t a day that goes by that you don’t cross my mind. Things have been a little unstable lately, but it seems that there is finally some light at the end of the tunnel. I don’t know what to make of many things, and it was weird because last night I was looking at your memorial tattoo and I thought of how soon another year will go by without you here. The time seems to pass so quickly, yet It feels like yesterday. I just have really come to believe that there are some relationships that are irreplaceble, that really only come once in a lifetime. I am thankful and feel blessed to have and have had those relationships. You knew just as I do that our ability to feel and love as deep as we do was a tremendous blessing, but could also be a tremendous cross as well. It’s funny to me that is the way it is. In all honesty we wouldn’t want it any other way though. I guess we could live our entire lives thinking about yesterday, but you were always about what today had to offer, and what tomorrow might bring. I’m trying to stay in that frame of mind. Thinking of you always my brother.

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5. 

   Mom says:

   September 21, 2007

   Trav,

   I hope you know that not writing in this guestbook lately, does not mean that I don’t think of you every minute of every day. I do. It’s just that sometimes by writing all of my feelings down, makes them seem overwhelming sometimes. Things have been hard on all of us since you left…each of us, in our own different ways, have gone through so many changes and challenges…we work really hard to find new meaning in living, to honor the way you lived, and to make a difference. It can be overwhelming at times.

   Missing you, my son……today, yesterday, and again tomorrow. I love you.

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