Agnes J. Duffy

Agnes J. Duffy

May 29, 1929 - December 05, 2009

Agnes J. Duffy

May 29, 1929 - December 05, 2009

Obituary

Agnes J. Duffy, 80 years young, was born to Clyde Annabel and Margaret English-Annabel in Newton Falls, Ohio on the 29th Day of May in the year 1929. This beloved wife, mother and grandmother sadly passed on December 5th, 2009.

She grew up in Youngstown Ohio before moving with her family to Southern California in June 1951. As a long time resident of Whittier, she worked in the banking industry, was a caretaker and raised a loving family. Agnes spent the remaining golden years of her life in Laguna Woods with her husband of 56 years. Her joys were simple family and friends – be they game nights, holiday celebrations or quiet visits.

In addition to her loving husband, Thomas F. Duffy, she is survived by 2 children, Kathleen and Patrick; two grandchildren, Kaitlin and Lily and her sister Jessie Olson.

An open celebration of her life will be held at 11:00AM, Saturday December 12th, 2009 at St Nicholas Catholic Church 24252 El Toro Road, Laguna Woods, CA 92637-3488. The service will be presided by Father Delahunty.

A reception will immediately follow at St. Nicholas Church while a private graveside service is to be held at Ascension Cemetery, El Toro, CA.

Flowers can be ordered through or sent to O’Connor Mortuary in Laguna Hills, CA. In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to the Special Olympics www.specialolympics.org.

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Mom’s Eulogy – 12 December 2009 – by Patrick Duffy

I cry not for the passing of my Mother, but for the love she gave. I was lucky enough to be ‘chosen’ in that love – to feel it from my youngest memories and unwavering until this day. In her eyes, I could do no wrong.

To be consumed by that unconditional love is something every one who knew her – knows. I know no one as giving and selfless as she. To love by her example is a mountain only she could climb.

The people fortunate enough to have been part of her life, know this truth. From family and friends and the mere acquaintance, her love touched all of them in a way that shaped a part of their life – just as it has mine.

Looking back, it took me almost 30 years to realize she was human. Prior to that, she was the omnipotent, larger than life super hero known only as Mom – this ever-present being that provided, nurtured, consoled and loved me.

It has only been these last 10 years or so that I realized she was just a little girl at heart. One that wanted to have fun, play games, and cherish each day with her family and friends. For Mom, the simplest of these was merely having her children at her side. Money could never procure the joy that provided for her. And in Mom’s few remaining days, Kathleen and I, were – together with her.

Sharing in her pain while she slowly passed last week was difficult on everyone. Family and friends near and far, they all spoke of her with such kindness, compassion and love while in the fortunate but uncomfortable position to say their good byes. Though so cruelly implemented, my Mom wouldn’t have wanted to depart without such opportunity.

However, true to a love I have never witnessed anywhere else – is the love between my parents. They had been inseparable for almost 60 years. It was only as the house had emptied when they were alone, hand in hand, did Mom decide to leave – silently, the two of them, side by side. As fate would have it, a tragic but beautiful conclusion to the love they shared.

My mind is awash with memories of a wonderful happy childhood. It could not have been any better. For me, the special gift my parents gave me my life, and their love could never be equaled. And though half of that foundation has been torn away from me, her love will never disappear. It is, who I am.

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Eulogy for Agnes J. Duffy, my wonderful Mother – by Kathleen Duffy Bailey

Kindness, compassion, tolerance, sympathy, goodness, generosity, innocence, forgiveness and love.

But above all else: love.

These are the words I use to describe my mother. She embodied these qualities so fully that you might wonder if she wasn’t really an undercover angel put here to remind us that loving one another is what’s most important.

She was the best person I ever met. She was the best person a lot of people ever met.

What was it like to have such a mother?

She didn’t preach or lecture to us; she didn’t go on about being good and doing the right thing.

She was simply a constant example of a loving heart: day after day, through her actions, her words, her unshakable optimism, and her acceptance of everyone, in whom she saw only the good.

She was incapable of doing otherwise. Love was the very core of her nature. She was the purest heart I’ve ever known.

So I can’t speak of her as if she was just my mother. As her daughter, it was clear early on that I couldn’t claim her as just my own.

So many, many people loved her, relied on her, cared for her; so many people absolutely adored her. Not just family, friend and neighbors she made an effort to reach and befriend everyone she came in contact with. And for many, she was not only a friend but like a second mother as well.

Love radiated from her beautiful soul out into the world, and I know it made an everlasting impression on all the hearts and minds she ever touched.

So now it is a comfort to have had such a mother a mother who so generously shared her love. I know she now dwells in a great many hearts: memories of her, and her influence of goodness and love, are spread wide into the world , and so she lives on.

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14 responses to Agnes J. Duffy

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  1. Dear Mr. Duffy,
    I am fortunate enough to be a friend of your son, Patrick, and wanted to express my heartfelt condolences to you, as well as to Patrick and Kathleen and the rest of your family, for the loss of your beloved Agnes. Your nearly 60 years together is a testament to your love, and please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.

  2. julie says:

    I have a memory of your mom even though it been 25+ years. I remember going to dinner at your house on a friday during Lent. We had to eat Fish Ugh! any way Thats a memory I have remembered forever. I an SO sorry for your Families loss. julie

  3. Jon Le Leux says:

    Mr duffy our hearts go out to you and your family during this touching time.
    You must have a full life of great times and memories! how special to have been together for so many years, you are a true testament to the values of a time many people have forgotten. Thank you for letting me into your lives as a young man. I will cherish the memories forever!
    sincerely, Jon Le Leux

  4. Dear Duffy, Kathleen and Patrick and family,
    Sincerest sympathy from your Pa
    family…wish we were able to express our sympathy personally.
    We all have wonderful memories of
    great times shared, including picnics, dinners, bunko games, music, Christmas parties and your hospitality and personal tours of CA when we visited. Agnes always had a smile,softspoken and showed her love and laughter to everyone. May God’s loving arms embrace you with comfort and Bless your family and loved ones.
    Hug each other for us..LOVE YOU !
    Kathryn,Myrtle,Mabel,Ruthy, and
    Gini and our families.

  5. I am so sorry for your loss of such a great woman. Our thoughts and prayers have been with all of you during this time.

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