3 Reasons Why You & Your Phone Should Take a Break
3 Reasons Why You & Your Phone Should Take a Break
In today’s busy world we are programmed to go go go! With the help of technology, the “go go going” is getting faster every day. We have cell phones that make dinner reservations, coffee makers that use iPods, and DVRs that record the television shows we like to watch so we can fast forward through them. With all of these devices I sometimes feel like George Jetson running on his treadmill in the sky. Why do we use all of these gadgets? So we can save time!
But in the process of “saving time” I find myself wasting a lot of it on the same devices that were supposed to help free-up my time in the first place. While playing with my son, Jesse, I am on the phone texting, reading emails, looking up NBA scores and checking out Facebook. I realized that I am losing precious time with Jesse that I can never get back. He doesn’t have a pause or rewind button. If I miss one of his milestones, that’s it. There is never going to be another “first time”.
Life gives us an unknown amount of time on this earth so we need to spend it wisely. Have our gadgets really helped us save time? If so, what have we done with all the saved time? Think about the quality of your time, enjoying the moment and tuning in by turning off.
Virtual vs. Real – Instead of having a virtual conversation, have a real conversation. Really listen when somebody is speaking to you. You may miss that nugget of wisdom because you were two steps ahead of the conversation and eager to give your response without letting them finish their thoughts; and all because you are trying to save time. When you give time to others through listening and attention you not only improve the quality of your relationship but you spend your time wisely.
Enjoying the Moment – We have a tendency to worry about what happened yesterday and what might be in store for us tomorrow instead of enjoying the actual moment we are in. I become more aware of this when it comes to my son. I only have a few hours with him each day and I want those hours to become a lifetime of memories for both of us. In other words, I’m intentional about the time I spend with him.
Tune In by Turning Off – This is such a simple concept, yet I often see couples out to dinner checking their cell phones. I’ve been guilty of this on occasion – don’t make my mistake. The emails and messages are still going to be there in a couple of hours so have a great date! Anne wrote about the importance of allowing your mind to rest before bed and I’m also advocating that you do this as you enter into playtime with your kids or a date night. Either turn your phone off ahead of time or choose to ignore it when you’re with these special people. You will be happy you did.
Now take a moment and pause, no really . . . PAUSE. Now, think of the simple things in life that make you happy and ask yourself these questions:
Do I struggle with enjoying the moment? What can I do to change that?
What can I do to improve the quality of my time?
Which relationships need more of my focused attention?
Neil
39 Comments
Wow Neil so TRUE!
I am guilty as well. When I am out with friends or family I am always connected to my phone. As soon as I get an email or text or phone call I look at my phone and usual respond. After reading your blog I realize how those emails, texts, and phone calls are not that important and if I am out with my friends or family being with them is more important. I am sincerely going to not make my cell phone so important and when I am out not checking it constantly and enjoying the company I am with.
Thanks fro the blog!!!!!
Shayna
Hi Shayna –
I am glad to see you observe this within you, you actually inspired me to write this, I am joking! As I mentioned I realized how much of my life was getting sucked into my phone with emails, Facebook, texts etc., and I was not in the moment with Jesse Joe. He is the gift God gave us not the iPhone. Steve Jobs was a zen man, I am not sure if he realized how much this technology takes away from our lives. Maybe I will text him and see if he answers, I doubt it?
Neil,
Guilty as charged…. Wow! Just when I was guilt free too. Well my friend it sometimes makes me long for the days before pagers even, when we were truly unreachable unless we were near our landline phone. We just called them phones. Oh, I’m old. This is another opportunity for needed discipline in my life.
Thanks for detailing an elegant solution to not so complicated problem. I like what Greg said above, “turn off, and drop in”. Face to face is just more fun.
Jeff
Jeff –
Guilt free? Really?
My new commitment to you is this, during our next meet my phone will be off the entire time. The rest of the world can live without me for a couple hours, it’s not like they need me anyways.
I was guilty of this last night. Our son was really putting on a show for us and I was busy on my phone. Neil reminded me of this post… Busted! Thanks for the simple reminders and great date nights.
Hi Lisa
I have been the guilty one!
I will commit to you and Jesse that my phone will be turned off when I come home, unless I am on call.
I love you!!!
XOXO
When will people learn? I read in the Yoga Journal that a VP of a major search engine firm, I think Google, said when he drives to work to he does not look at his phone or answer calls or emails. He simply remains mindful to his driving and the beautiful surrounding along his route. He meditates 45-minutes a day as well. This helps him manage his stress and contain emotions during his work day. If a VP can take a technology free hour, so can you.
This is a great post my friends and something I share with others as well.
HUGE HUGS Neighbors.
T
Hi Tanya –
I love this story. I am going to take you up on this advise, my phone will be shut off when I am driving.
Thank you for all your love and support, your comments on our blog and Facebook inspire me to keep moving forward. Your life’s journey gives me perceptive that every moment is precious.
Thank you for being such a dear friend,
Neil
XOXO
Neil,
I’m so glad that you have witnessed this, pondered it and now have written about it. EVERY single word you have written is true. What is this absolute necessity to be connected every single moment of every day? To be connected to what? Trivia, idle discourse, app after app after app? Does one really have to “follow” the Kardasians as part of their daily lives? Live your own life, here and now.
I’m from the generation that if you have something you want to say, then it should be important enough to want to call me. To want to hear total communication from me, and that means my VOICE. I believe that hearing the sound of one’s voice can be a wonderful thing. One’s tone can change the whole direction of a conversation and bring that communication to a higher level. (But if you are bothered by something I have done, by ALL means, text me or email me only) and what is this thing about yelling at people in CAPITAL LETTERS in tech conversation? How does one spell the word COWARD?
Don’t get me wrong, of course communication technology is a wonderful thing and it can be efficient and useful and a terrific time saver.. But like everything else it has its boundaries. People must make a conscious decision to keep it in its place.
As you have stated, life’s moments cannot be repeated. When my kids would act up when something important and of value was going on, I trained them. All I had to do was tell them “you are missing the moment” and they would settle down because they didn’t want to miss anything.
In the 60’s (sorry, before your time) LSD druggies and their famous Guru, Dr. Leary, had a famous mantra, “tune in, and drop out”.
In the 12’s, the new mantra for TECH druggies should be “turn off, and drop in”.
Thanks for your words,
Greg
Hi Greg –
Thank you for your reply! You completely understand the value of staying in the moment, other wise you will miss something, something great. As you know, we have one chance in life to get most everything right, there is no application to send us back in time and repeat what we have missed because we choose to not pay attention. When we lose our attention we pay for it and we will never get it back. You have a great insight to staying present in the moment, I am learning from you everyday. Thank you Greg!
Nicely said, Greg! Great comments worth adhering to.